Famous Josh Billings Quotations

First 1 Last 
"About the most originality that any writer can hope to achieve honestly is to steal with good judgment."
by Josh Billings
"There is no revenge so complete as forgiveness."
by Josh Billings
"A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself."
by Josh Billings
"It's not only the most difficult thing to know one's self, but the most inconvenient."
by Josh Billings
"Reason often makes mistakes, but conscience never does."
by Josh Billings
"There are people who are always anticipating trouble, and in this way they manage to enjoy many sorrows that never really happen to them."
by Josh Billings
"A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself."
by Josh Billings
"A man running for office puts me in mind of a dog that's lost--he smells everybody he meets, and wags himself all over."
by Josh Billings
"After enlightenment, the laundry."
by Josh Billings
"As scarce as truth is, the supply has always been in excess of the demand."
by Josh Billings
"As scarce as truth is, the supply has always been in excess of the demand"
by Josh Billings
"As long as we are lucky we attribute it to our smartness; our bad luck we give the gods credit for."
by Josh Billings
"Be like a postage stamp. Stick to one thing until you get there."
by Josh Billings
"Common sense is the knack of seeing things as they are and doing things as they ought to be done."
by Josh Billings
"Common sense is instinct, and enough of it is genius."
by Josh Billings
"Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing till it gets there."
by Josh Billings
"Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing till it gets there."
by Josh Billings
"Don't take the bull by the horns, take him by the tail then you can let go when you want to."
by Josh Billings
"Every man has his follies -- and often they are the most interesting thing he has got."
by Josh Billings
"Every man has his follies -- and often they are the most interesting thing he had got."
by Josh Billings
"Flattery is like cologne water, to be smelt of, not swallowed."
by Josh Billings
"Good nonsense is good sense in disguise."
by Josh Billings
"I have lived in this world just long enough to look carefully the second time into things that I am most certain of the first time."
by Josh Billings
"I never question a success, any more than I do the right of a bulldog to lie in his own gateway."
by Josh Billings
"It ain't what folks know that's the problem, it's what they know that ain't so."
by Josh Billings
"It is true that wealth won't make a man virtuous, but I notice there ain't anybody who wants to be poor just for the purpose of being good."
by Josh Billings
"It's a wise man who profits by his own experience, but it's a good deal wiser one who lets the rattlesnake bite the other fellow."
by Josh Billings
"Josh Billings said, It is not only the most difficult thing to know oneself, but the most inconvenient one, too. Human beings have always employed an enormous variety of clever devices for running away from themselves, and the modern world is particularly rich in such stratagems."
by John W. Gardner
"Knowledge is like money the more he gets, the more he craves."
by Josh Billings
"Laughing is the sensation of feeling good all over and showing it principally in one spot."
by Josh Billings
"Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well."
by Josh Billings
"Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well"
by Josh Billings
"Like other occult techniques of divination, the statistical method has a private jargon deliberately contrived to obscure its methods from non-practitioners."
by Josh Billings
"Love looks through a telescope; envy, through a microscope."
by Josh Billings
"Love looks through a telescope; envy, through a microscope"
by Josh Billings
"Love looks through a telescope envy, through a microscope."
by Josh Billings
"Marrying for love may be a bit risky, but it is so honest that God can't help but smile on it."
by Josh Billings
"My son, observe the postage stamp! Its usefulness depends upon its ability to stick to one thing until it gets there."
by Josh Billings
"No one can disgrace us but ourselves."
by Josh Billings
"One of the greatest victories you can gain over someone is to beat him at politeness."
by Josh Billings
"One of rarest things that a man ever does is to do the best he can."
by Josh Billings
"Silence is one of the hardest arguments to refute."
by Josh Billings
"Silence is one of the hardest arguments to refute"
by Josh Billings
"Some folks as they grow older grow wise, but most folks simply grow stubborner."
by Josh Billings
"The best way to convince a fool that he is wrong is to let him have his own way."
by Josh Billings
"The fools in this world make about as much trouble as the wicked do."
by Josh Billings
"The man whose only pleasure in life is making money, weighs less on the moral scale than an angleworm."
by Josh Billings
"The time to pray is not when we are in a tight spot but just as soon as we get out of it."
by Josh Billings
"The trouble with people is not that they dont know but that they know so much that aint so."
by Josh Billings
"There are lots of people who mistake their imagination for their memory"
by Josh Billings
"There is nothing so easy to learn as experience and nothing so hard to apply."
by Josh Billings
"We hate those who will not take our advice, and despise them who do."
by Josh Billings
"What is a man profited, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul I suppose this depends somewhat upon the size of the soul. I think there are cases where the trade would do."
by Josh Billings
"When a man makes up his mind to become a rascal, he should examine himself closely and see if he isn't better constructed for a fool."
by Josh Billings
"When I see a man of shallow understanding extravagantly clothed, I feel sorry - for the clothes."
by Josh Billings
"Advice is like castor oil, easy to give, but dreadful to take."
by Josh Billings
"Adversity has the same effect on a man that severe training has on the pugilist -- it reduces him to his fighting weight."
by Josh Billings
"Most people when they come to you for advice, come to have their own opinions strengthened, not corrected."
by Josh Billings
"In youth we run into difficulties. In old age difficulties run into us."
by Josh Billings
"I have never known a person to live to be one hundred and be remarkable for anything else."
by Josh Billings
"It is better to know nothing than to know what ain't so."
by Josh Billings
"To bring up a child in the way he should go, travel that way yourself a while."
by Josh Billings
"Incredulity is the wisdom of the fool."
by Josh Billings
"There's a great power in words, if you don't hitch too many of them together."
by Josh Billings
"The happiest time in a man's life is when he is in the red hot pursuit of a dollar with a reasonable prospect of overtaking it."
by Josh Billings
"I have lived in this world just long enough to look carefully the second time into things that I am the most certain of the first time."
by Josh Billings
"There is a significant Latin proverb; to wit: Who will guard the guards?"
by Josh Billings
"To enjoy a good reputation give publicly, and steal privately."
by Josh Billings
"The miser and the glutton are two facetious buzzards: one hides his store, and the other stores his hide."
by Josh Billings
"There are some people so addicted to exaggeration that they can't tell the truth without lying."
by Josh Billings
"If there was no faith there would be no living in this world. We could not even eat hash with any safety."
by Josh Billings
"Flattery is like cologne water, to be smelt, not swallowed."
by Josh Billings
"Most people repent their sins by thanking God they ain't so wicked as their neighbors."
by Josh Billings
"It is much easier to repent of sins that we have committed than to repent of those that we intend to commit."
by Josh Billings
"Knowledge is like money: the more he gets, the more he craves."
by Josh Billings
"I honestly believe it is better to know nothing than to know what ain't so."
by Josh Billings
"The trouble with most folks ain't so much their ignorance as knowing so many things that ain't so."
by Josh Billings
"Love is said to be blind, but I know some fellows in love who can see twice as much in their sweethearts as I do."
by Josh Billings
"The best medicine I know for rheumatism is to thank the Lord it ain't the gout."
by Josh Billings
"Men mourn for what they have lost; women for what they ain't got."
by Josh Billings
"Music hath the charm to soothe a savage beast, but I'd try a revolver first."
by Josh Billings
"If a man should happen to reach perfection in this world, he would have to die immediately to enjoy himself."
by Josh Billings
"A dog is the only thing on earth that will love you more than you love yourself"
by Josh Billings
"Woman's influence is powerful, especially when she wants something."
by Josh Billings
"Wisdom has never made a bigot, but learning has."
by Josh Billings
"Don't put off till tomorrow what can be enjoyed today."
by Josh Billings
"One of the rarest things that a man ever does, is to do the best he can."
by Josh Billings
"Be kind to your mother-in-law, but pay for her board at some good hotel."
by Josh Billings
"Old maids sweeten their tea with scandal."
by Josh Billings
"There is no greater evidence of superior intelligence than to be surprised at nothing."
by Josh Billings
"Pity cost nothing and ain't worth nothing."
by Josh Billings
"It ain't so much trouble to get rich as it is to tell when we have got rich."
by Josh Billings
"The thinner the ice, the more anxious is everyone to see whether it will bear."
by Josh Billings


Hire a Writer