Despite the intensive heat waves that blew across Nigeria on the 11th of February 2024 coupled with a total black out from the National grid, Nigerians moved out of their homes in droves to visit the nearest public viewing centre to watch the AFCON finals. As the fans paid the hiked #200-gate fee amidst tales of lamentations, this dialogue followed.
Emeka: Oboy! This heat today fit kill person oh! If not for this Nepa wahala, I for sit down for my house jeje watch dis match under AC.
Musa: True talk my guy. I bin bend my generator to see if fuel remain but the tin dry pass Sahara desert.
Ola: Guys, una mata even beta. My last #200 wey I been dey plan to watch match and drink garri, na him dis film hall guy collect so oh. Since when finals become two hundred box. Anyway, if these Naija guys want, make dem no carry dis cup. Dem go hear am
Emeka: Line up don comot sef
Ola: You don’t mean it. Abeg, make I see am
Musa: Hope say dat guy wey dey play for Fulham dey bench
Emeka: Which guy be dat?
Musa: Iwobi na
Emeka: Haha haha haha…. Dey there dey play. Ur guy na number one for list
Ola: Chineke! We are finished
Emeka: Why you dey shout?
Ola: You no see wetin dat guy do for our last match. Even to pass ball, him bin no fit pass
Musa: Make I no lie una. My grand mama wey dey for Kano ball pass dat guy
Ola: Wetin you just talk.
Musa: I talk say my grand mama play ball pass Iwobi
Ola: Stop dat rough play. No be every time person dey lie oh! You think say we be small pikin abi.
Emeka: Arise oh compatriot, Nigeria’s call obey, To serve……
Musa: To serve wetin. Shun dat national anthem wey those players dey sing
Ola: Haba Musa. Why you interrupt dey guy anthem na? We suppose be patriotic citizens
Musa: Forget dat tin. Match don start joooor
Emeka: Twenty minutes don waka but Naija neva score oh
Ola: Na Iwobi dey cause am
Goaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaal
38 minutes: Ivory Coast 0-1 Nigeria
Emeka: Oboy, See nodding. Na who score dat sweet goal?
Musa: Na Ekong
Emeka: See my guy
Goaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaal
61 Minutes: Ivory Coast 1 -1 Nigeria
Ola: Guys, body dey do me like say Naija go loose dis match
Musa: God forbid
Goaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaal
Full time: Ivory Coast 2-1 Nigeria
Emeka: Oboy, dis guys don fall person hand. Make we dey go house
Musa: Shebi I bin tell una say my grand mama sabi play ball pass dat guy. Una bin dey deny
Ola: Na true tin you bin dey talk. Wetin come dey pain me pass be say, the money wey I for use soak garri belle full, na him I come use to watch dis super chickens match
Musa: From today, anytime Iwobi see me for road, make him run enta bush
Ola: For your dreams abi na for where? You no sabi say after dis match finish, dey guy go fly enter Oyibo land. Make I even ask you dis question. Since dem born you, you don japa from Ikorodu?
Emeka: Make una forget dat yeye talk. As for me, I go block dat guy for Twitter and Instagram.
Musa: Correct guy, wetin be him username?
Emeka: Just type him name, you go see am
Ola: Him must collect vawulence woto woto woto dis night
Musa: I tell you. E be like say him don forget say we be keyboard warriors
Emeka: Anyhow guys, we go see online during the vawulence vigil. Bye bye
From the fictional pidgin dialogue above, it is safe to note that discussing a topic that relates to emotional intelligence and the growing trend of online abuse is a necessity. To this end, let us quickly establish the definition of some terminologies for a better understanding of the discussion.
Definition of terms
Nigerians are people from Nigeria or people with ancestry from Nigeria.
Emotional intelligence also known as “emotional quotient” is the ability to understand, use, and manage your own emotions in possible ways to relieve stress, communicate effectively, empathize with others, overcome challenges, and defuse conflict.
Online abuse refers to any type of abuse that happens on the internet. This could happen across any device that’s connected to the web and can happen anywhere online.
Nigerians are generally peace-loving people who strive to survive in any condition they find themselves in. Despite the abundance of natural resources available to cater to the needs of Nigerians, poor leadership, corruption, and resource mismanagement continue to throw the country into the quagmire of poverty.
Due to this hardship, many have begun to channel their resources to Japa (migrate) to other countries. For those unable to migrate out of the country, they are left frustrated. This prompts many of them to turn to the internet to catch a cruise, forget their sorrows and overcome boredom.
With the current hardship, comes an increased rate of online abuse. Nigerians now vent their anger over the economic downturn through abusive posts and uninformed decisions. Why is it so?
Well, before the democratization of the internet and phone technology in Nigeria, the standard of living and economic situation was favourable to the average Nigerian. This made it difficult for people to notice the lack of emotional intelligence among Nigerians.
According to Bankole Allibay, who is a consultant at the World Bank, “There is this assumption that men have it all figured out and that they are doing well and perfect. The truth of the matter is that the global business place requires more from us now than it has been over the years”.
Despite this revelation, many Nigerians still underrate the important role emotional intelligence can play amidst technological advancements. This negligence has made many Nigerians to be inconsiderate about the plight of others.
In the month of January 2024 when the AFCON was scheduled to commence, things were very tough for Nigerians to the extent that many started trekking to their workplace because of the high cost of fuel. For those who couldn’t meet up with the distance to their workplaces, resignation came calling.
Since over 60% of the Nigerian population is ignorant about emotional intelligence, they were forced to shift their attention to the AFCON to get some relief.
When Nigeria played her first match with Equatorial Guinea, many who had been battered by the economy started looking for a scapegoat on whom they could vent their anger. I remember vividly how some group of Nigerians started insulting Victor Osimhen for missing a goal during that match. This was after the young boy single-handedly scored a goal that prevented us from being beaten.
As the tournament progressed, a series of misplaced passes and lacklustre performance from Alex Iwobi started ruffling feathers online. If these Nigerians were indeed emotionally intelligent, they would have found a better way to express their displeasure to the football authority than dragging the boy with insults and abuses online. The lack of empathy also manifested as these fans failed to understand that his Premier League team overused him before the tournament. This may have caused him to suffer from burnout or a muscle cramp. In the past, many players have turned down an invitation to the national team due to similar issues, but this young man waved his comfort aside out of love to honour an invitation to defend the public image of his fatherland.
Aside Alex Iwobi, another Nigerian who has been baptized with the fire of online abuses is Anthony Joshua. When President Muhammadu Buhari visited The United Kingdom in 2020 and held a meeting with the Nigerian community in the region, Joshua seized the opportunity to present the former President with some of the belts he had won in the boxing world. This sparked controversy online and subjected the young boxer to online abuses over his decision to prostrate before the President.
After the meeting, Joshua took to social media to claim that the meeting was about culture, not politics before going further to stress that prostrating was about respecting one's elders. Emotionally intelligent Nigerians who understood the place of culture praised him for prostrating before Buhari as a sign of respect for elders and a real embrace of his Nigerian roots but others rained insults on him.
A former aviation minister and PDP chieftain, Femi Fani-Kayode for instance took to Twitter to lambast him with the following words…”I find this picture (of Anthony Joshua prostrating before Buhari) utterly repulsive and disgusting. Prostrating before his slave master & a bloodthirsty dictator & tyrant who is viciously persecuting and humiliating his people. What a crying shame. This speaks volumes. He has lost me!”
Since all strata of the society play a part of online abuse, there is a need to highlight some benefits of emotional intelligence. This will assist us in proffering measures that will help in improving the standard of living and developing the emotional intelligence of Nigerians to curb the growing culture of online abuse. Stop online abuse
Benefits of emotional intelligence
*Through emotional intelligence, many Nigerians will be forced to develop mindsets that will help them to navigate tensions, chaos, and friction seamlessly without abuses.
*When more Nigerians become emotionally intelligent, the populace will be capable of making informed decisions during critical periods of election. This will translate to the election of selfless leaders.
*One thing I have noticed recently among Nigerian workers is that when they are faced with a hectic situation before work, their whole day is ruined. This makes productivity difficult in the workplace and increases online attacks. Through emotional intelligence training, Nigerians will be equipped to properly manage their emotions and be productive physically and online.
*Emotional intelligence reduces stress, teaches people how to react to constructive criticism, conquer fears, doubts, and insecurities
*It improves communication skills, enhances social skills, and increases frustration tolerance
*It fosters better leadership, strengthens team cohesiveness, and improves client service
Developing Emotional Intelligence among Nigerians to curb online abuse
To develop emotional intelligence among Nigerians, we need to do the following:
Firstly, parents and educators entrusted with the early development of kids should employ teaching techniques capable of developing emotionally intelligent mindsets. Curriculum developers should be tasked to incorporate emotional intelligence training into the educational curriculum to hasten the development of sane Nigerians.
Secondly, since the rise of online abuse is closely related to the economic hardship faced by Nigerians, governments at all levels tasked with the responsibility of governance should make efforts to improve the standard of living and make life enjoyable for Nigerians. When this is done, Nigerians will start channelling their energy positively.
A study conducted by Aboh James Ogbole among adolescents in Plateau state shows that when Nigerians are trained, their emotional intelligence is enhanced. During the study, the treatment group participated in six sessions of training involving intensive training in emotional-social intelligence skills acquisition for one month. The hypothesis test after the training showed that there was a significant effect of training on the emotional intelligence of adolescents with those in the experimental group scoring higher on emotional intelligence. To this end, network providers and phone manufacturing companies should be encouraged to take up the social responsibility of training and equipping Nigerians with emotional intelligence skills. This will help in developing empathy among Nigerians despite our diversity and truncate the growing menace of online abuse.
It is also important to note that each generation has its strengths and weaknesses. For the millennials, leveraging upon the use of technology and celebrities can encourage intellectual stimulation, foster individualized consideration, and cultivate effective feedback taking among the next generation.
Furthermore, religious people tasked with the role of nurturing the morals of Nigerians should shun covetousness and admonish their followers about the dangers of online abuse. When this is practiced consistently, it will eradicate the culture of online abuse from Nigerian cyberspace.
Instead of throwing banters and cyberbullying, learn How to deliberately live a purposeful life 1.
There is also a need for stiffer punishment to be meted out to perpetrators of online abuse to discourage the growth of online abuse. This can be through the ban of abusive accounts, arrest of account holders, and payment of damages to victims of online abuse.
Finally, in the spirit of Easter, join me to sing the Amazing grace hymn. Happy Easter in advance.
References
- https://www.cio.com/article/228465/what-is-transformational-leadership-a -model-for-motivating-innovation.html
- https://www.google,com/search?q=emotionalintelligence
- https://www.talentsmarteq.com/articles/emotional-intelligence-and-transformational-leadership
- Palmer B, Walls M, Burgess Z, Stough C. Emotional intelligence and effective leadership . Leadership Organ Dev J.2001;22:5-10
- https://www.continu.com/blog/15-benefits-of-emotional-intelligence-training
- https://www.nspcc.org.uk/what-is-child-abuse/types-of-abuse/online-abuse
- https://guargian.ng/news/emotional-intelligence-can-help-Nigerians-cope-with-current-economic-downturn-experts
- https://www.researchgate.net/publication/348230802_emotional_intelligence_among_Nigerian_adolescents_the_role_of_training
- https://www.gistmania.com/talk/topic,452361.0.html
- https://pmnewsnigeria.com/2020/01/19/fani-kayode-lambasts-anthony-joshua-for-prostrating-before-buhari